The Queen’s Tale by Kaye Umansky
Think you know the tale of Snow White inside and out? Know all about the Seven Dwarfs, the mirror, the joyful woodland creatures? How about the ruined carpets, the ghastly genie and the to-die-for macaroons? No, that bit not familiar? Possibly not, because this is The Queen’s Tale…
The Queen is unimpressed. Not only is her husband the King such a novice when it comes to magic he thinks a magic mirror is amazing (pah, he should try a Seeing Pool, magic mirrors are so last year), but he’s got this incredibly drippy daughter, Snow White. The girl is a complete wimp, always bringing her cutesy animal friends into the house and letting them ruin the carpets and nest in the candelabra, it’s honestly enough to drive the poor Queen out shopping. At least she knows how to look good and she prides herself on her gorgeous appearance – that is until the Magic Mirror dares to tell her she is not the fairest in the land and that that honour actually belongs to… Snow White, the wet and wishywashy stepdaughter!
What’s a Queen to do? Well, order the huntsman to kill her stepdaughter of course…
I’ve got to say, I love the Queen. She’s so utterly unimpressed with her husband and Snow White and her descriptions of Snow White as she frolics with her animal friends or sings songs about bunnies are brilliantly grumpy. She’s the embodiment of why eveyrone secretly likes the bad guy, in this case because Snow White is so utterly wet!
The story is very familiar – it is the traditional tale of Snow White after all, complete with ribbon, comb, poisoned apple and glass coffin – but it’s being told from the Queen’s point of view which gives a bit of a new spin on things. I love how disparaging she is about the imbecile huntsman, and her utter disgust with Snow White’s luck with the ribbon and comb. I especially like the addition of a secret lair and her habit of mixing potions when she’s truly fed up or when shopping trips just won’t cut it.
In short it’s the tale of Snow White, but from a much funnier angle than usual. In the words of the Queen – ‘Result’!
Find The Queen’s Tale here